"What are my choices?" he asked.
She replied, "Yes or No."
1. Don't take the machine into the air unless you are satisfied it will fly.
2. Never leave the ground with the motor leaking.
3. Don't turn sharply when taxiing. Instead of turning sharp, have someone lift the tail around.
4. In taking off, look at the ground and the air.
5. Never get out of the machine with the motor running until the pilot relieving you can reach the motor controls.
6. Pilots should carry hankies in a handy place to wipe off goggles.
7. Riding on the steps, wings, or rail of the machine is prohibited.
8. In case the engine fails on takeoff, land straight ahead regardless of obstacles.
9. No machine must taxi faster than a man can walk.
10. Never run motor so that blast will blow on other machines.
11. Learn to gauge altitude, especially on landing.
12. If you see another machine near you, get out of the way.
13. No two cadets should ever ride together in the same machine.
14. Do not trust altitude instruments.
15. Before you begin a landing glide, see that no machines are under you.
16. Hedge-hopping will not be tolerated.
17. No spins on back or tail sides will be indulged in as they unnecessarily strain the machines.
18. If flying against the wind and you wish to fly with the wind, don't make a sharp turn near the ground. You may crash.
19. Motors have been known to stop during a long glide. If pilot wishes to use motor for landing, he should open the throttle.
20. Don't attempt to force the machine onto the ground with more than flying speed. The result is bounding and ricocheting.
21. Pilots will not wear spurs while flying.
22. Do not use aeronautical gasoline in cars or motorcycles.
23. You must not take off or land closer than 50 feet to the hanger.
24. Never take a machine into the air until you are familiar with it's controls and instruments.
25. If an emergency occurs while flying, land as soon as possible.
The chief of staff walked up to them, stuck out his hand and introduced himself. He looked at the first young man and asked, "Son, what skills can you bring to the Air Force?"
The young man looks at him and says, "I'm a pilot!"
The general gets all excited, turns to his aide and says, "Get him in today, all the paper work done, everything, do it!" The aide hustles the young man off.
The general looks at the second young man and asked,"What skills to you bring to the Air Force?"
The young man says, "I chop wood!"
"Son," the general replies, "we don't need wood choppers in the Air Force, what do you know how to do?"
"I chop wood!"
"Young man," huffs the general, "you are not listening to me, we don't need wood choppers, this is the 20th century!"
"Well," the young man says, "you hired my brother!"
"Of course we did," says the general, "he's a pilot!"
The young man rolls his eyes and says, "Dang it, I have to chop it before he can pile it!"
Martha VS Maxine Do you realize that in about forty years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos? Money can't buy happiness...but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Porsche ! than in a Hyundai.
*Martha's Way* *Maxine's Way *
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom
the bottom of the cone to prevent of the cone, for Pet's sake! You are
ice cream drips. probably lying on the couch with your
feet up eating it anyway!
To keep potatoes from budding, Buy Hungry Jack Mashed Potato Mix.
place an apple in the bottom of the Keep it in the pantry for up to a year.
bag with the potatoes.
When a cake recipe calls for Go to the bakery! They'll even decorate
flouring the baking pan, use a bit it for you!
of the dry cake mix instead, and
there won't be any white mess on
the outside of the cake.
If you accidentally over salt a dish If you over salt a dish while you are
while it's still cooking, drop a peeled cooking, too bad. Please recite with me
potato and it will absorb the excess the real woman's motto, "I made it and
salt for an instant "fix-me-up". you will eat it and I don't care how bad
Wrap celery in aluminum foil when Celery?? Never heard of it!!
putting in the refrigerator and it
will keep for weeks.
Brush some beaten egg whites over The Mrs. Smith's frozen pie directions
pie crust before baking to yield a don't include brushing egg whites over
beautiful glossy finish. the crust so I don't.
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill, and
it in half and rub it over your fore- drink!
head. The throbbing will go away.
If you have a problem opening jars, Go ask the very cute neighbor if he can
try latex dishwashing gloves. They open it for you.
give a non-slip grip that makes opening
Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Leftover wine???????? HELLO!!!!!!!!
Freeze into ice cubes for future
use in casseroles and sauces.
The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.
Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.
After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead.
As usual, if you don't forward this to ten of your friends within the next five minutes, your belly button will fall off. Really, it's true! Have I ever lied to you?
Love, hugs, and lots of laughs
Do you realize that in about forty years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?
Money can't buy happiness...but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Porsche ! than in a Hyundai.